This pass year has been really hard and tough on us all with Covid 19, its made us all value the little things, from going to a shop easily to hugging a family member.
For me I spent more time with God, thinking about who I am and what I am doing, I found myself going over how I handle things, I seem to hold on to hurtful things, and sometimes can just feel upset and mad inside for months later over little things that someone has said.
At the beginning of last year I was told my help was not needed anymore by fellow Christian, and I found myself really affected by the words he said. I found that they wanted others help instead of mine. I always did what I could and loved what I did but then I was faced with heartache over this matter.
People may question why did it effect me so much but I can not say why, I just felt kicked out and not wanted and this then effected my mental health. I always felt not wanted as a child and not good enough and even as a grown women I was still feeling the same way, not good enough.
I so wanted to not let my hurt show so I just carried on with my website and normal family life until I felt ready for change. I needed to let go and move on from the hurt, Yes words can really hurt by others and it can real knock you, but for my own health I needed to pick myself up again and move on.
The way I moved on from this was to give it to God, and I prayed so much and cried and just said please God free me from this pain I feel, and over time I found myself forgetting it and when it came to mind it did not hurt so much.
I found that maybe it was a blessing that things ended and changed when they did, that my help was not needed anymore because then I had more time for RCM and then I started working with others and helped others in need who needed me. Sometimes God closes a door but opens another door and even though it was not my plan it was his.
Moving on and Letting Go may seem really hard to do but with God he can help us get though it. Covid 19 has been hard but it made me see that I should not worry about somethings and value more other things that I took for granted.
So I end with this… I value each and every one of you who reads this and supports me with RCM, I know I am not the best in this business but I also know that this is what I can for God. Thank you all for your love and support, you are loved.